I hate the roller coaster

WARNING: this post contains my rantings at 1:17 am. If you don't want to get mad, etc., don't read, alright?

I feel like everything my friends tells me they admire about me (in essence, me) is the only thing keeping me from figuring out relationships. How's that for irony.

things friends have told me they admire about me:

"for cryin' out loud, you use a hankerchief!"
the way I complement people, just because.
that i'm naive (hm...)
that I tackle people and hug them/ am spontaneous
that I carry on semi-intelligent conversation

In turn, I feel like I'm not part of the "conversation" because I don't understand all the inuendo and slang required. Really, I don't want to expand my "education" any more, but I hate feeling foolish and having people tell me to shush. I HATE it. Shut up yourselves. and get your mind out of the gutter. That's how I feel, but it's not so polite to say.

I complement people. If you look nice, I'll bloody well tell you. I'm not flirting. I haven't mastered that fine art yet. Obviously, tackling people (or in some people's cases, getting within 3 feet of them) is considered flirting. well. so much for passing the peace.

Things I wish I was better at: confronting people. I always encourage people to confront others they feel offended or confused by, because conversation is the only way to communicate. seems simple. I'm no good at it. I'll think over what I'll say over and over, but good luck getting it out.
Plus, I wish I was wittier and much funnier. It would help conversations get going so much faster. As it is, I can freely discuss things I know and understand. I offer many opinions on things I've heard. And, when I have no idea what the topic is about, I feel very left out. It happens often.

Once again, I'll say: A friend is someone that you can talk with for hours on end about absolutely nothing.